TC 16: No Children
by Tegan's Muse
Summary: Tegan and Janet have some issues to work through.
1. Chapter 1

**Tegan Chronicles**

**No Children 1**

"Glad you made it home." Janet's tone was icy and sent chills down Tegan's spine.

"I didn't know I had a curfew," She looked nonchalantly at her watch. "Cassie's waiting."

"Sam's up there." Janet warned. "She got tired of waiting for you, so Sam went up to tuck her in."

"She's getting too old to be tucked in." Tegan knew it was the girl's way of staying up later than her set bedtime.

"She enjoys the few minutes she gets to spend with you two."

"It's not like I haven't been crashing here for the last week." Tegan couldn't wait until they finished repairing the water main and she could get back to her own routine. She'd been staying on base, since she received word from her landlord that the water main under her street had ruptured and it would be a few weeks before they would have it fixed and the road repaired so the residents in that area could return. When Janet found out she was working through the night she insisted she stay with her. Insisted with blackmail, some threat ending in reminding Tegan she was the chief medial officer.

"How was your day?"

"It was a day."

"You worked late."

It wasn't a question, still Tegan obliged with an answer. "I was running some DNA comparisons."

"I made you a plate, it's in the fridge."

"I'm going to bed."

"You ate on base?"

"See this is why I don't want to live with you." Tegan made the mistake of continuing her line of thought despite knowing better. She should have just walked away, left it at that. "I can take care of myself."

"You may be able to take care of yourself but you don't. You know you need at least three squares a day, and if you get three a week you think it's sufficient."

"I am not having this conversation."

"No you never do." Janet was too tired to fight, or maybe she just didn't care anymore.

"Whatever, I'm going to bed." Tegan watched as Janet looked back down at her book rather than give any acknowledgement to the statement.

Tegan looked up as Dr. Warner came into the room, she cleared her throat, "Where's Dr. Frasier?"

"She asked me to do your physical this morning." He shut the door behind him.

"Is she sick?"

"She looked fine to me." He glanced down over her chart. "I'll be right back."

"I don't think so."

"I just need to find out why Sgt. Copley didn't get your vitals."

"Because she knows Dr. Frasier prefers to do them herself," She looked at him for a minute then added; "And you're not doing my physical."

"But," He started to protest as Tegan swung herself off the exam table and walked out of the room.

"Done already?" Julie looked up from her work.

"Where's Dr. Fraiser?"

"In her office," Julie watched with mild curiosity as Tegan stormed through the infirmary.

"What the hell was that?" Tegan spoke as she stepped into Janet's office.

Janet glanced at the occupied chair before returning her gaze to the intruder. "Excuse me?"

Tegan looked sideways to see General Hammond sitting across from Janet's desk. She couldn't stop the crimson tide from creeping up her neck and washing over her face as she wished for an unscheduled off world activation to occur at that very moment. When the klaxons didn't blare to life she looked back at Janet. "I'm sorry, the door was open."

"You can close it on your way out Major." General Hammond gave her a disapproving look as she pulled the door shut. "What was that about?"

"I'm assuming it has to do with Dr. Warner doing her pre-mission physical." Janet offered with a shrug. "That and she's been working late recently."

"I'll have a word with her."

"Please do." Janet rubbed her forehead.

"Major Kiser," General Hammond followed Janet out of her office. "A word please."

"Yes sir," She mumbled while glaring in Janet's direction.

"Have a seat." He pointed to the chair he'd just vacated as he shut the door. "Was that little out burst personal or professional?"

"It was out of character sir, and I apologize."

"Yes it was Major, and I do believe you owe Dr. Fraiser an apology as well."

"Yes sir."

"I understand you've been working well past your shift again."

"On occasion sir." There wasn't any point denying it, although she didn't see what the big deal was. It wasn't like she was paid hourly.

"Why do I feel like I'd be wasting my breath if I told you to stop?"

"I'll do my best to leave on time sir."

"Thank you Major Kiser." He opened the door. "And just for your information we weren't talking about you."

"I didn't think you were." She smiled politely before following him out.

"You still have a pre mission physical to complete." Janet met her in the hall with her chart.

"Are you doing it?"

"I guess I have to don't I?"

"You're the one who made the rules not me," Tegan answered with a smirk.

* * *

><p>"Hello?" Janet answered the house phone a little after six.<p>

"We're back, and I wanted to let you know I'm staying on base until I can go home."

"Tegan…"

"I don't want to talk about it, not right now."

"Fine, but if I find out…"

"You won't." She mumbled 'bye' and hung up.

Two days later she got news she could get back in her house. She was happy to find she'd rented on the right side of the street, because her property had somehow managed to avoid any water damage. The yards and houses on the opposite side were still water logged, and the lower levels had standing mud in them. Thank goodness the grade was on her side.

It was the weekend and she and Janet agreed not to see each other, and that plan was working out just fine until the phone rang. Tegan looked at the digital readout on the VCR and sighed 2:10, who could be calling at this hour. Foregoing checking caller ID she picked up the cordless and automatically hit the talk button. "Kiser."

"Tegan," The scared voice on the other end was anxious.

"Cass, what's wrong?" Tegan jumped to her feet, already looking for a pair of shoes, and keys.

"Its mom," The girl's concern was palpable over the line. "She's sick. She didn't want me to call anyone but she's been throwing up for the last hour and a half."

"I'm on my way."

"I'll unlock the door, she's in the master bathroom."

Tegan cut the engine and ran through the door pausing only long enough to throw the dead bolt and toss her keys on the small table in the entry way. She took the steps two at a time and found Cassie sitting on the side of the tub holding a cool rag for her mother who currently hung her head in the toilet. The smell of vomit assaulted Tegan's senses before she ever entered the bedroom.

"Thanks for coming." Cassie knew Tegan hadn't been to bed, because she'd gotten there too soon to have changed clothes.

"No problem kid."

Janet lifted her pale head and gazed at Tegan with exhausted brown eyes. "I told her not to wake you."

"She didn't, I was finishing up a field report." Tegan glanced around. "Where's your medical bag?"

Before she could answer Janet was forced to pay homage to the porcelain gods by gagging until the smallest amount of stomach acid made its way up her esophagus.

"I'll get it," Cassie jumped to her feet leaving the rag on the edge of the sink in her wake.

Tegan took up residence where Cassie had once been, and put a gentle hand on Janet's shoulder immediately feeling the heat rising off her. "You've got a fever."

"Stomach bug," Janet's voice echoed as it bounced around the commode. "You should go, you don't want to catch it."

"I won't."

Janet gagged again. "Even wonder woman got sick."

"I'm a doctor."

"So am I, yet here I am hugging a toilet."

"You should have let her call me earlier." Tegan complained. "Do you have any Phenergan in your bag?"

Janet nodded as Cassie came back in.

"Thanks Cass, I've got her from here." Tegan looked sympathetically at the young girl. "Go on to bed, she's going to be fine."

"Does that mean you're not mad at her anymore?"

Tegan closed her eyes for a second. "I was never mad at her, I just… Why don't you take Shadow to bed with you?"

Cassie nodded as Tegan started rummaging through Janet's bag.

"You just what?" Janet moved resting her head on the cold tile floor.

"Do you know how many germs are on that floor?"

"I beached it Friday, and I don't really care right now."

Tegan pulled out the Phenergan injector like a trophy.

"I don't need that."

"You do, and I'll call and let them know you won't be in tomorrow."

"I love you."

"You're sick." Tegan held the injector to Janet's exposed thigh and pushed the button. As she scooped Janet into her arms she whispered, "but I love you more."


	2. Chapter 2

**Tegan Chronicles**

**No Children 2**

"You're back." Tegan smiled when Janet came in Thursday to do her pre-mission physical. "I thought you were going to take another day?"

"I'm feeling fine, and Cassandra insisted I let her go back to school today. She's afebrile and swears she feels fine. It was a short lived bug." Janet opened Tegan's chart. "Thank you for coming over."

"Why wouldn't I?"

"I don't know, just…"

"I was having a bad week and you breathing down my neck didn't help."

"I care about you."

"I know," Tegan sighed. "And I'm sorry."

"It's ok. How are you feeling?"

"Fine, I don't think you or Cassie shared your germs with me."

"That's good." Janet nodded. "Sam didn't fair so well, she's two beds over getting Phenergan and IV fluids."

Tegan stood up when Janet told her she was cleared to jump. "Janet?"

"Yes?" She tilted her head back to look up at her.

Tegan pressed her lips to Janet's and sucked her bottom lip gently into her mouth lightly grazing it with her teeth before she broke away. "I love you."

"We're at work," She whispered and then cleared her throat. "Try and come back in one piece."

"Yes ma'am." Tegan smiled softly before pulling the privacy curtain back and leaving.

* * *

><p>"You're better?" Tegan asked when she saw Sam in the gate room on Monday when they returned.<p>

"I am." She smiled. "Did I miss anything good?"

"Nope." Jack shook his head. "Just the usual."

"We have a usual?" Daniel inquired sarcastically.

Teal'c decided to offer his own answer, "The mission was most uninteresting Major Carter."

"I missed you." Tegan spoke faintly as Janet stepped around the privacy curtain to do her post.

"Any injuries?" Janet pulled out her stethoscope.

"No." Tegan gave her a puzzled look.

Janet remained quite as she finished up her physical only asking questions when she needed to. When she was done she pulled out her prescription pad and scribbled something down before tearing the top sheet off and offering it to Tegan. "Don't leave base until I get your labs back."

"I'll be in my quarters." She took the paper from Janet's hand and looked at the note.

You can show me how much you missed me tonight.

Dinner at seven.

Dr. Frasier

"It's a school night." She glanced up.

"It's been taken care of. I'll call with your labs."

* * *

><p>"Hey, come on in." Janet opened the door and watched as Shadow came trotting in.<p>

"Smells good what is it?"

"Hamburger stew, it's been in the crock pot all day."

"And if I hadn't shown up?" Tegan closed the door behind her.

"Then I guess Cassie and I would be eating leftovers all week."

"What can I help you with?"

"Nothing, I've got the bread heating up in the oven." Janet led the way down the hall. "I've got fresh squeezed lemonade is that ok?"

"It's fine." Tegan followed enjoying the slight sway of Janet's hips under her shorts.

"You know," Janet sat down across from Tegan at the table, "You can't do what you did after your last pre-mission physical."

"What'd I do?" Tegan grinned.

Janet took a bite of her French bread and shook her head. "How was the mission?"

"Boring, I missed you and the guys were a pain without Sam there." Tegan pushed food around her plate before loading a potato, carrot and chunk of ground beef on it.

"Have you thought about having kids?" Janet waited until Tegan had swallowed what was in her mouth before asking, afraid she might choke.

"I've never given it much thought. I guess I always just assumed I couldn't."

"Things have changed a lot over the last thirty years."

"How about you?"

"I can't, a result of severe scarring from endometriosis." Janet offered simply.

"I'm sorry." Tegan reached over with her left hand as she continued to eat and covered Janet's hand with hers.

"It's ok, Cassandra helped fill that void for me." She smiled gently. "So, you haven't ruled it out?"

"No, but I would need something more than…" Her voice trailed off and she pushed her plate back.

"I think we need to be a little more stable." Janet decided to change the subject. "Are you full already?"

Tegan pulled her hand away and stood up moving to a chair closer to Janet. "For now." She whispered in her ear before sucking on the soft skin of her neck, her hands wandering inside Janet's cotton shirt.

"You're making it impossible for me to eat."

"I know." Tegan smiled into Janet's neck. "If I could have your baby I would."

Janet's fork clattered onto the table and Tegan pulled her head back.

"Are you ok?"

"What did you say?"

"You heard me." Tegan brushed her thumb over Janet's navel.

"No, I'm not sure I did."

"I said," She leaned in her breath tickling Janet's ear, "I would have your baby if I could."

Janet turned trapping Tegan's lips with hers, when she pulled back she looked deep into those green irises. "Seriously?"

"Yes." She didn't hesitate.

"You wouldn't be able to jump for the entire pregnancy, and a few months or more after. It'd be over a year."

"I would do it for you." She nodded. "I'd walk across hot coals if you asked me to."

"Well," Janet cleared her throat, "Unfortunately I don't have any sperm so it looks like you're off the hook."

"There are other ways you know, I mean, if you really wanted to have a baby."

"Do you even realize the kind of commitment you're talking about?"

"We'd have to get a new house, a bigger house, something like a duplex with an adjacent door inside."

"Military regs?"

"Just a formality." Tegan shrugged.

"It would help," Janet agreed.

"So," Tegan stood up pulling Janet to her feet, "I thought I was supposed to show you how much I missed you."


	3. Chapter 3

**Tegan Chronicles**

**No Children 3**

Tegan rolled over when the alarm clock went off and mumbled. "Morning."

"Go back to sleep." Janet placed a tired kiss on her forehead. "I'll see you when I get off."

"I…" Tegan stopped as she remembered it was her day off since she'd worked the weekend. "I'll be here."

"Hey, how was work?" Tegan greeted as Janet walked into the kitchen.

"Slow, you weren't there to keep me busy."

"Very funny." Tegan turned the burner on under the broccoli.

"Where's Cassandra?" Janet glanced around the kitchen.

"She should be in the den finishing up her homework." Tegan pulled the brownies out of the oven. "Dinner will be ready in about ten more minutes, but I can keep it warm if you want to grab a shower first."

"I'll get a shower after, it smells too good to wait."

* * *

><p>"You know what?" Cassie posed over dinner.<p>

"What?" Janet raised a curious eyebrow.

"Tegan should just move in." She pointed to the spread of food. "We could get used to this."

"I cook." Janet defended as Tegan looked at her.

"I didn't say you didn't, but things just seem calmer when she's here."

"In what way?" Tegan ignored the warning look Janet gave to both her and Cassie.

"She doesn't have to worry about you when you're here, and I think she's happier when you're around." Cassie grinned at her mom. "You should ask her to move in."

"It isn't quite that easy." Janet tried to explain.

"Well it should be."

"Where would I put all my stuff?" Tegan asked.

"We'll just have to get a bigger house." Cassie answered as if it were a no brainer.

"Go on up and get your shower, Cassie and I will take care of dishes." Tegan shoed Janet upstairs after dinner.

Janet jumped as Tegan slid into the shower behind her. "Where's Cassandra?"

Tegan wrapped her arms under Janet's arms and cupped her breasts as she pulled her back into her. "She's out back playing with Shadow, she'll probably need a shower when she comes in so I thought we could conserve hot water."

"You're making it a little hard for me to wash with your hands planted there."

"True, but I think they're stuck." She grinned as she leaned down and kissed where Janet's neck and shoulder met.

"Did you put Cassandra up to that tonight?"

"No," Tegan's hands slid down to Janet's hips, "She came up with that one on her own."

Janet nodded. "We'd better get clean before we get caught."

"Yeah." Tegan pulled away as Janet turned to face her. "I don't know what came over me."

Tegan slid her hand between Janet's legs while wrapping a strong arm around her back to hold her up.

"Mom." Cassie pounded on the door.

"Shit!" Tegan whispered as she pulled a towel around her.

"I'll be out in a minute Cassandra." Janet cut her eyes to Tegan who had not only distracted her in the shower, but had continued to do so when they got out.

"Do you know where Tegan is? She said was going to do dishes, but they're still sitting on the table and I can't find her."

"I think she said something about taking a walk." Janet shook her head she couldn't believe she was lying to her daughter.

"Oh, ok. I'm going to get a shower."

"You might want to wait a few more minutes, I think I used up most of the hot water." Janet pushed Tegan away and clamored into her night gown.

"Alright, can I play video games until then?"

"Did you finish your homework?"

"Yes."

"Half an hour, then you need to get a shower and read."

"Ok." She was already heading down the hall as she answered.

Tegan's hand was snaking up Janet's gown and she swatted it away. "Would you stop it? You're stuck in here all by yourself for the next half hour until she's in the shower."

"You're no fun."

"You didn't think so ten minutes ago."

Janet joined Tegan in the kitchen while she finished cleaning up the dishes. "I'm heading home after I finish these up."

"Why?" Janet wrinkled her brow.

"Because I won't get any sleep all alone in your guest room knowing you're just down the hall."

"Who says you have to sleep in the guest room?"

"Cassie."

"She didn't say that, and I most certainly didn't say that."

"Do you want a baby?"

"What?" Janet wasn't sure how the conversation had turned.

"Do you want a baby?"

"With you?"

"No with Teal'c."

"I'm serious." Janet crossed her arms.

"So am I." Tegan dried her hands on a dish towel. "Yes with me."

"Maybe."

"Maybe?" She unwrapped the brownies and pulled out two napkins.

"Yes, ok, I would very much like to have a family with you; but like we said last night we need to work on us first."

"Would you be willing to move?" She slid a brownie across the counter to Janet.

"I'd like to keep Cassandra in the same school district, but yes, I'm just not sure I can afford it right now with the housing market the way it is." Janet took a bite of the brownie and tried not to moan as the chocolate and caramel exploded in her mouth. "Why?"

"I don't know." Tegan shrugged but Janet could see the wheels turning in her head. "I'm going to take this up to Cass."

"Remind her to brush her teeth when she's done."

When Tegan came back down a few minutes later Janet was sitting on the couch. She sat the brownie down on the coffee table before she settled on the couch.

"I've never known her to turn down chocolate."

"She was already asleep." Tegan shrugged.

"Ah, and you don't want it?"

"No." Tegan yawned.

"I think you wore yourself out in the shower," Janet chuckled.

"And you didn't have anything to do with it?"

"Hey I didn't invite you into my shower in the first place."

"Well, next time I'll just let you shower alone." Tegan stood up and pulled Janet to her feet. "Let's go to bed."

"It's early."

"I know, but I want to snuggle."

"I think I'm going to start calling you my cuddle bug."

Tegan blushed knowing the guys would give her such a hard time if they knew she liked to snuggle. "I thought I was your sex bunny."

"You can be both." Janet cut out the lights before she followed Tegan upstairs.


	4. Chapter 4

**Tegan Chronicles**

**No Children 4**

"Hey-lo." Tegan stuck her head in Janet's office.

Janet looked up at her as if she'd just lost her mind. "Hey?"

"Got a minute?"

Janet checked her watch. "I've got ten."

"Good." Tegan stepped in a shut the door behind her. "Do you mind?"

"No." Janet pointed to the chair in front of her desk.

Tegan sat down and uncomfortably cleared her throat. "I have an appointment at the sperm bank at five and I wanted to know if you wanted to come with me?"

"I thought we talked about this last week?"

"We did, I'm just going to get information."

"I suppose you've been looking at houses without me too?"

Tegan swallowed. "We'll have nine months to find something suitable."

"I thought you were just going to get information?"

"I am," She sighed.

"What's your rush?"

"I'm not getting any younger, and neither are you."

"I'm five years older than you. It's not even a generation gap." She complained. "Besides you still have several childbearing years ahead of you."

"I'm just trying to plan, what if you want more than one."

"What if 'I' want? This is supposed to be about what 'we' want." She tried not to raise her voice, her office wasn't exactly sound proof, although the thick concrete walls helped the window looking out into the corridor didn't.

"It is." Tegan rubbed the bridge of her nose as if it would clear her mind. Hoping the right words would miraculously tumble out of her mouth. "It's my body."

"Damn you Tegan."

Ok, so those weren't exactly the right words. "Janet, I'm just saying…"

"What, what are you 'just' saying Tegan?"

"I don't want to fight with you, especially not about this. I just wanted us to get the information so that 'we' could make an informed decision. I didn't want us to get our hopes up and then a year down the line get our hearts crushed. That's all."

"And house hunting without me?"

"I'm weeding out the crap holes so you don't have to waste your time." Tegan looked up at the clock on the wall with the yellowing face. "I need to go find Siler."

"Just in case we can't buy sperm?"

"No, I think I could do better. I'm sure Greg would jump at the chance." Tegan smiled lightly.

"I'm sure he would." Janet shook her head.

Tegan ignored the jealously in her voice. "So, do you want to go with me tonight?"

Janet nodded.

Tegan was standing in the embarkation room talking to Sergeant Siler about building a reinforced cage, in case they were able to bring back any wild animals from their mission scheduled for the following week. SG8 had been to a planet that was tropical in nature and had encountered some rather strange wildlife. According to the field reports there were frogs the size of large dogs, animals that looked like half elephant and half tiger. Primates that she was told differed greatly from anything they'd seen here on earth. General Hammond managed to fit it in so SG1 could check it out, just not immediately as she had hoped.

She looked up as the first chevron lit up, and seconds later the klaxons were announcing an unscheduled off-world activation. Tegan didn't think she'd ever seen an incoming wormhole connect so quickly. The event horizon whooshed to life before the klaxon gave its first alert. Siler stepped back waiting for the Iris to close.

Up in the gate room one of the technicians announced that the iris wasn't responding. Sam took over, having already been working on updating the computers' software when the problem occurred.

Tegan glanced back noticing security still hadn't made it into the area, and neither she nor Siler were armed. "This isn't good."

"Watch out!" Siler yelled as a projectile ripped through the event horizon.

Tegan didn't have time to register Siler's warning or the flash silver metal before she felt the burning and tearing deep in her womb. The white hot liquid heat rippled through her body as she reactively curled fetally around the long spear like object that was now propelling her backwards.

"Get that iris closed!" General Hammond's voice boomed in the control room. He wouldn't call in a medical team until he knew the area was secure and that meant the iris was shut.

Tegan instinctively grabbed the long metal shaft as she fell to the floor, several two inch barbs popped out randomly and miraculously missed slicing into her hands. Her mind spun and she moaned under the intense pain as she wondered what was taking so long. Where was everyone?

The security team stormed into the embarkation room with P-90s cocked and ready, just as the wormhole disconnected. Seconds later the iris slid shut and a medical team was dispatched.

Sam was the first one from the control room to reach Tegan's side. Siler was still standing there in shock, this was one of the reasons he didn't do combat.

"Tegan?"

Tegan groaned, it was all she could manage at the moment. She was currently on her knees curled around the foreign object that was presently impaled through her pelvic region.

Sam looked at the weapon where it protruded just below Tegan's belt. It was a shiny silver metal alloy shaped into a sharp arrowhead. She could tell it was going to be difficult to remove as she tried to slow the bleeding.

"How is she?" General Hammond stood behind Sam.

"I don't know, sir."

"Breathing." Tegan managed between gasps.

"Glad she didn't say fine." Jack announced his presence. "What happened?"

Before anyone could answer Janet pushed her way past Daniel and the large Jaffa. Spotting Tegan she almost knocked Colonel O'Neill and the General over. Reaching her destination Janet quickly assessed the situation. "Get the OR ready, and I need two units typed and crossed stat."

"Oh shit." The pain engulfed Tegan's brain, and Janet's voice sounded like she was underwater.

Janet glanced at Tegan's pale pain ridden face. The pain was so intense she had a thin sheen of sweat covering her entire body. "I'm going to give you morphine."

Tegan weakly nodded her assent, something that made Janet's stomach do summersaults. "Do whatever you have to do."


	5. Chapter 5

**Tegan Chronicles**

**No Children 5**

Janet sat beside Tegan's hospital bed holding her hand listening to the rhythmic beeping of the heart monitor. The surgery had taken several hours. Because of the spear's design they couldn't just pull it out with out causing more damage, and it took what seemed like eternity for them to cut through the unknown alloy with a blow torch.

"Hey." Janet's voice cracked when she saw Tegan's green eyes looking at her.

"How bad?"

Janet looked away trying to put her emotions in check. "I had to remove your uterus and your appendix."

Tegan nodded and rolled away from Janet who put her hand on her shoulder.

"I tried to save it, but you were losing too much blood, and the damage was irreparable. I'm sorry."

"I can still work right?"

"You'll be off for a minimum of four weeks. Sam used the healing device to repair the nerves that were damaged where the weapon exited."

"Fine."

"You do understand what I just said, what this means?"

"I went to medical school." She picked up the button to the patient controlled anesthetic pump and did something Janet had never witnessed before, she pressed the button.

"I'll be right here."

"Go rest, you don't have to stay."

"I want to stay."

* * *

><p>"I don't know why I have to take medical leave for four weeks," Tegan complained. "I'm almost completely healed thanks to the healing device."<p>

"Because I said so." Janet was tired of having this conversation. They'd had it on base, again in the car, and now as they walked into Janet's house.

"Why can't I go home?"

"Nothing's ever going to change is it?" Janet was glad Cassie was over at a friend's house working on a science project.

"We don't live together Janet, and now that I don't have a baby carriage that's probably never going to happen."

"You wanted to have a baby just because you thought it was the only way we'd live together?"

"That's not what I said." She paled, and wondered why they were still standing in the entryway. "Why do you have to take everything the wrong way?"

"Why did you want the baby?" Janet tried to keep her tone even.

Tegan knew she was circling the drain, she also knew she was never going to make it to the couch.

By the time Janet realized what was happening it was too late, the bottom had fallen out and so had Tegan, her head hitting the wall on the way down.

"I'm fine." Tegan pushed Janet's hands away.

"Of course you are." She shook her head as she stood up. "When you're ready to admit you're not, I'll think about helping you up."

"Look at us, we don't need kids. Hell, we act like a couple of kids ourselves."

"Speak for yourself. I've already got a daughter."

"I want us to be happy." Tegan propped herself against the same wall she'd hit.

"I am happy."

"But I thought you wanted kids."

"I have Cassandra."

Tegan held her hand out ready to get up, Janet just looked at the outstretched hand for a minute.

"I didn't hear you say you weren't fine."

"You're relentless," Tegan grumbled before trying to get up on her own. Despite all the progress of the healing device she was still sore, and her body was weak from the trauma. Short of having a symbiote or spending time in a sarcophagus, neither of which she had, she would just have to let nature finish its course. "Fine, I'm not fine. Are you happy?" She fell back against the wall frustrated. "You know I didn't even have to leave earth for this one."

"I know." Janet held out her hand and acted as a counter balance as Tegan hefted herself to her feet. "Hey?"

"Head rush." She supported herself between Janet and the wall for a few seconds.

"Let's get you to the couch before you do any real damage, and we can talk about dinner."

"I'm not…"

"You need something." Janet cut her off as she plopped down on the couch. "How do you expect to get better if you don't eat?"

Tegan laid her head back on the head rest and closed her eyes. It was immature, but she thought if she closed her eyes and ignored her, maybe Janet would leave her alone. Of course it had never worked before, but that didn't stop her from trying.

Janet watched Tegan for several minutes. She wished she could go back to the morning before this happened and redo the whole thing. She wished she had a crystal ball and could have seen this coming. Maybe she could have stopped her from being in the gate room at that precise moment. Maybe she would have never brought up children in the first place.

She reached out and brushed Tegan's bangs off her forehead, relishing the sparks she always felt when their skin touched briefly. "I'm still here."

"I know." Tegan kept her eyes shut.

"You still need to eat."

"Janet?"

"Yes?" She leaned forward as if Tegan were going to give her the key to all the secrets of the universe.

"Hold me."

Janet pulled Tegan gently into her arms and rocked her lightly. "What is it?"

"I don't want to talk, just hold me and don't let go."

"I won't." She patted Tegan's hair as she settled her head on Janet's shoulder.

Tegan rubbed her eyes as Janet came into the living room.

"Hey?"

"Heh." It was more of a grunt then an actual word.

"You ok?" Janet sat next to her on the couch.

"Fine."

"Of course," Janet sighed. "I always cry when I'm fine."

She thought about denying crying, Tegan Kiser didn't cry, but she didn't. "It's nothing."

"Why won't you talk to me?"

"Because you're already suffering enough."

"Why do you say that?"

"Because now there's no chance that we can have kids."

Janet took Tegan's left hand in both of hers and cradled it on her lap. "Is that what you think?"

Tegan nodded and sniffed as she reached for a tissue.

"Do you know what my first thought was when I saw that metal spear impaled through you?"

"Damn, not again." A small goofy smile danced across Tegan's features and then faded.

Janet returned the brief smile before shaking her head. "No, all I could think was 'I hope she doesn't die on me.'"

"Well, I didn't."

"And that's all that matters to me. I wish I never brought up having kids. It was just one of those what if questions. I don't know that I want to get up for two am feedings, and diaper changes. If this hadn't happened and we had a child, it'd be a while before he or she'd be going for sleepovers, etc."

"I hadn't really thought about that."

"Plus, had I been able to repair your uterus, I'm not sure it would be safe for a fetus to live in you womb for nine months even if you didn't jump."

"I guess we're pretty lucky, all we lost was my uterus."

Janet nodded.

"There are other options."

"Is that what you really want?"

"Not really," Tegan pulled her hand free, "No."

"Good." Janet surprised her. "Me either."

"What do you want, Janet?"

"I want to grow old with you. And every time there's a medical emergency I'm so afraid that's not going to happen."

"But," Tegan brushed brunette bangs out of Janet's eyes, "You're wonder doctor. You can fix anything."

"Obviously not." Janet's eyes fell.

"Hey," Tegan cupped her chin, "Warner probably would have let me hemorrhage to death. You made the right choice."

"I know, I just…"

"Don't, it was the only way. Besides, I'd love nothing more than to grow old with you too." She leaned over and kissed Janet's cheek.


	6. Chapter 6

**Tegan Chronicles**

**No Children 6**

"What's wrong with us?" Tegan sat at the table after dinner staring into a mug of Pepsi.

"What do you mean?" Janet closed the door to the dishwasher and crossed back into the dinning area.

"Four weeks ago we were arguing over me working late, and how that was why I couldn't live with you, three weeks ago we're talking about having kids and moving in together. And now here we sit, no prospects of kids and…" She let her voice trail off.

"The baby thing was just a question." Janet wondered how many times she was going to have to say that before they started believing it. "It wasn't a let's do it now. In fact if I remember correctly you were the one who jumped into that one with both feet. Come to think of it you're always jumping into things without looking."

"I was looking." She defended herself. "I was going to gather information. Not get a popsicle of the sperm variety."

"But why the rush?"

"I don't know, I can't count the number of times I've cheated death. I guess life's too short, I don't want to miss out on anything or have any regrets when it's over." Tegan sighed.

"Well," Janet stood back up, "I think you answered your own question."

"Do you think I'm crazy?"

"I know you are."

"Thanks a lot." Tegan smiled lightly.

"You can go home tomorrow."

"When can I go back to work?"

"Another week and a half, maybe."

"Maybe?" Tegan whined as Janet turned off the dinning room light.

* * *

><p>"I thought you were going home today?" Janet asked when she came home to the smell of meatloaf in the oven.<p>

Tegan stood up and walked into the kitchen so Cassie could play her video games in peace.

Janet followed.

"You said I could go home, did that mean you wanted me to go home?"

"No." Janet pulled her hair free from its bun.

"Because if you want me to go, just say the word and I'll go."

"I don't Tegan," she sighed. "I just thought you'd be happy to leave."

"I'd be happy to stay, at least until I have to go back to work." Tegan pulled the lid of the potatoes she had boiling. "Unless you want me to go."

"Would you stop saying that? I don't want you to go."

That night Janet gasped into Tegan's ear, "I don't ever want you to go."

"Hey," Tegan whispered into the darkness.

"Yes?" Janet answered in a normal voice.

"Have you thought anymore about moving in together?"

"I have, I looked at my finances and I just don't see how I can do it. Not with the housing market in it's current slump. I'd have to sell this place first."

"Is that really the only reason?"

Janet nodded before she realized Tegan couldn't see the movement in the dark. "Yes."

"I found some new duplexes that are being built, would you come look at them with me?"

"Why the sudden urgency?" Janet thought Tegan hadn't been happy with her rental for quite sometime, but now all of a sudden she was looking.

"I go back to work in three days, who knows when I'll have a chance to look again."

"You can still stay here when you go back to work."

"It's not the same." She rolled with her back to Janet and was surprised to feel Janet press her body along hers.

"I know."

* * *

><p>"What did you think?" Tegan asked as they left the last of the duplexes she had on her list, and her personal favorites.<p>

"It was nice. A nice neighborhood, pretty nice views, not far from base."

"Would you want to live there?"

"I thought we talked about this?"

"I didn't mean now. Say I bought one side and in a year or two the other side came up for sale and the housing market was perfect? It's in Cassie's school district." She added for good measure.

"It is a really nice neighborhood." Janet smiled. "I don't think I'd mind living there."

Tegan smiled and looked out the window. "Thanks for coming with me."

* * *

><p>Tegan cracked her knuckles while waiting for Janet to finish jotting in her chart. "I guess you heard where the spear came from?"<p>

"I did."

"General Hammond locked the planet out of the dialing computer and canceled the mission. I guess I won't get to see any of those dog sized frogs."

"You're probably better off."

"Today's mission should be safe."

Janet nodded.

"I'll miss you."

"I know." She closed Tegan's chart and looked up. Every time it got harder and harder. "Have you thought about resigning your commission?"

Tegan nodded. "I actually tried to once, didn't make it very far. Evidently I'm too popular. I have to lose life or limb to leave the Air Force."

"I'm not surprised."

"Really?"

"Look at Colonel O'Neill; they pulled him out of retirement."

"So maybe if I stop saving his ass?"

"No, they'd probably still keep you."

"True, so am I cleared to jump?"

"You are." Janet closed her chart.


End file.
